Angelus Joshia Landon

I'm punishing myself..o yes it seems..
but ironic it is that i'm happy punishing myself.maybe its makin me feel important or maybe i'm jus glad that i FINALLY DID SOMETHING. i'm sounding like a depressive piece of dung. but i'm not hating myself..o no i'm not..i'm jus being sarcastic to myself. uh huh...yep...that's right.

i'm suddenly thrown into this catatonic phase again..so listless and indifferent about everything.negativism hovers around and above me like a saintly halo. Everything seems so mundane and boring to me..i think i need some bigger Thrill in my life. Gossips make me wana squirm and scream "Come on people!! Get alive!!"...alcohol and dirty games don't make me "high"..they jus make me wana sleep or die.come on people, get alive..can't you see i'm just acting to get along with the jive?

But i'm definitely far from being depressive..i have no intentions of killing myself despite what i've mentioned above (come on people..its jus jive). In fact, i'm quite happy with where i am now and who i am now. who says one can't be happy and bored at the same time?who's to undermine my faith by questioning my duties to a church?hell...(or shall i say heaven?)..i'm praying to God not the stupid buildin called The Church.
heaven...i'm not bothering you so why should you throw a cockroach at me to make me think like i need a bath?leave me alone...

why am i so bothered about a cockroach anyway?
cos cockroaches are dirty and they made me jumped awhile ago.
i hate cockraoches..the next time i see one tryin to pretend dead and only to spring to live when i approach, shall face my wrath. i will catch them and pluck their wings out...sandwich them between two stones and grind them into a squishy mess..o yes...i am that evil...

but they made me jumped awile ago..